Maybe you have to know the darkness before you can appreciate the light.
My latest stats tell me... Six babies are stillborn every day in Australia and an estimated one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage.
There are just no words to describe the anguish experienced after a miscarriage or infant loss - let's face it, from personal experience, it breaks you.
My recent post announced the very happy news that I am pregnant. And I have been doing a lot of thinking and conscious efforts to be happy about this pregnancy and not to feel any guilt about being pleased and relieved and pregnant again, this baby will not replace the bond I have with Sebastien and Samuel and I need to remember this baby will have a part of them in it also.
Have you heard of RAINBOW DAY - 15th October? It is a day where we recognise all of those babies born following a miscarriage, neonatal death, stillbirth, or infant loss of a previous pregnancy. We honour those Angels that were born for just a moment in our lives.
Any mum who has lost a baby in utero, during birth or post birth knows, the sadness never quite passes. And should you be lucky enough to fall pregnant again, that next pregnancy can be filled with many anxious moments – the fear and thoughts that go through your head any time you have to go to the toilet, nervous thoughts constantly going through your head, googling (the worst thing to do and you really shouldn't)
counting the kicks, a quick call to the doctor regularly, constantly worried something could be wrong.
Someone once told me there is no right or wrong way to feel after a miscarriage, stillbirth or infant loss and there is no right or wrong way to grieve - we each have to go through this grief in our own way. Some people are stronger and get through it a lot quicker and remain positive about what's ahead - this doesn't mean they are over it or will ever forget, there are others who don't quite deal with the pain and grief and hold it all in - this can have many negative and serious effects later on in life and then there are those who just can't go on, they may have to depend on antidepressants, they see no light at the end of the tunnel.
The pain may never completely pass but we must all keep in mind, there is hope for happiness in the future...somehow, somewhere over the rainbow...
The most important message that I take from this is that those mothers experiencing or who have experienced loss need to know that they aren't alone, I read an article recently that talks about miscarriage and loss of a baby or infant is not talked about nearly enough and this needs to change. Let's work together to change this...
Please always remember ... "The Darkest Nights Produce The Brightest Stars".