A year on...

Exactly 1 year ago today I found out that my pregnancy, 9 weeks in, was actually with my MCMA (Mono-Chorionic/Mono-Amnitoic) Twins.

I think of Sebastien and Samuel every day, particularly as I am now showing with my baby daughter, at 29 weeks. I am getting her nursery ready and have set up the twins ashes and photos of their scans in the Nursery, as although I am far from being a religious person, I do believe and like to think that they are watching over their baby sister.

Whilst on this journey back in Perth, having met so many new contacts due to excessive networking to try to build a client base and partner network for my business - Fraser Marketing International, I have found myself in many situations whereby we end up discussing why I moved back and I talk about the twins and that journey, the responses I get are overwhelming. People are very supportive and recognise this is a growing trend of career driven women who choose to go it alone as an SMC (Single Mother by Choice), as well as the challenges to this journey, around women getting back into the workforce and blending work and personal life - it is not about balance any longer.

A new contact had been through a similar story, she had hit the magic number in age and decided to go through an Egg Donor from overseas, unfortunately it wasn't successful and she had to deal with that in her own way, but she made a very interesting comment and one I had never thought of... we don't have a name for us parents who lose a child, whether it be through a pregnancy, early baby years or infant loss - you have a widow, widower, orphan, but no name for us mums and dads who lose a child; I thought this was a very interesting comment to make and one I had personally never thought of but it is true!

I still thank my lucky stars that I fell pregnant and was so very fortunate to have carried my twins for half of a full-term pregnancy, longer than the medical teams had anticipated given they were MCMA twins. I am also so pleased that I pushed myself to go through the next round and listened to my network of family and friends, whom all said I was strong enough to go through it all again, although I very much doubted my levels of emotional strength at the time.

Let me just say, it has been a rollercoaster of a ride and every week, sometimes daily, I had concerns or worries, or would just cry and create all of these scenarios in my head! This is normal, so I have been told and I do believe it's true. I have been very cautious throughout and even now with a couple of months to go, I still get anxious that something could go wrong - it's ok to be like this and my medical team, family and friends have been phenomenal in getting me through each step of the way.

I am very, very lucky and eternally grateful that I could fall pregnant again and have got myself to the third trimester and am looking forward to meeting "Baby Button" in about 9 weeks time!

I encourage anyone to go on this journey and am always here to talk to, should you need it. I am also very excited that this week I was told that I am the inspiration behind a 3rd woman who has decided, at 38 years old, to go down the same path and journey I am on! Go Girl!!!